Executive Action

This weekend's snow reminded me of something I forgot to BLOG previously after our last big storm.

Mike Palanacki is The Man!

None of this pussy footing around for him. No hiding behind a bunch of subordinates. No fears in doing what he thinks is right. No fears of being blamed. No memos to superiors. Action oriented.

• “In light of last year's budget crunch and another looming, Palanacki decided not to send plows to side streets on Wednesday after 10 cm of snow fell, which is the threshold the city generally uses as a guide to start side-street plowing.
  
  "It was on the margin and I made an executive decision not to go," said Palanacki, noting that every time the city's side streets are plowed it costs $250,000.”

No CYA stuff for him. So what if it was going to snow the next day and the total accumulation would be over the margin… the sun was going to come out eventually and it would have melted everything anyway.

Cars sliding through intersections or multiple fender-benders---let the insurance companies worry about that! I can just see him waving off criticism à la Marie Antoinette:

• “If Taxpayers cannot shovel snow or drive in it, let them go to Florida!”

That is the kind of forward thinking we need in our City especially with the economic crisis that we along with others are going through. It got me thinking. What could other Department Managers do to emulate what Mike has done?

1. If a Department is audited, the manager would not hand over all the documentation just like at the 400 building. It saves time for the Department. It saves work effort for the Auditor. If the audit report is a good one, who cares. If it is a bad one, then the manager only need to say that the Auditor didn’t review the complete file. As an example:
   
   “He said the department had more documentation that was never considered regarding the city’s fuel than was indicated in the audit report.”


2. Close Down the E C Row Expressway for a couple of years. Look at the savings and maintenance that this would achieve. After all, in Detroit, several expressways were closed for that period of time with respect to the Ambassador Gateway project and people found alternative routes.


3. Continue not to plow sidestreets. Summer is coming soon enough


4. Have the police start writing provincial offence tickets since our numbers are way behind other cities in the Province. Our City's director of provincial offences wants to see more law enforcement.


5. With smart meters, Enwin would have the ability to cut off power at people’s homes while they were at work. They won’t miss it if they are not there. Of course, the system would have to take into account people’s shiftwork. For those however who need power, charge them a licence fee for doing so on top of exorbitant kilowatt charges since they would be buying power at peak times.


6. Collect garbage every couple of weeks. It’s only garbage after all that people are throwing out anyway


7. Don’t cut the grass at parks or in City medians. Just call it giving Windsor the natural look and being environmentally friendly


8. Eliminate the costs of 311. Just have a recorded announcement saying that the call load is heavy and that it will take some time for a call to be answered. The person telephoning will give up and hang up


9. Remove the City website and replace it with "Error 404 "Page not found." People will think that ther are server problems and never return. If they call 311 to complain, see above


10. Councillors should have a recorded anouncement telling callers to call 311 only. After all, they are part-timers. If they call 311 to complain, see above


11. Don’t fix potholes. They are just going to need fixing again. In this way, we would encourage people to bicycle


12. Let’s pretend to do a huge P3 infrastructure deal with WUC, the Tunnel and Enwin in one big package. We can pretend that with the money received, which will never come but that is a minor detail, that our deficits will have been wiped out, that our roads and sewers will be fixed and that we will have huge amounts of money in hand that ultimately will reduce our taxes.


13. Remove the Blackberrys from Members of Council. As is abundantly clear, no one listens to our Mayor and Councillors anyway


14. If a Member of Council is going from downtown Toronto to the Airport, don’t call a limo or a taxi. Call Dwight Duncan instead


15. No microphones should be used at City Council at all so that Cogeco cannot pick up the sound for TV viewers. In this way, our Mayor cannot be criticized for using a Kill Button. In fact, cancel all public Council meetings since the Mayor decides everything important with the Councillors in camera.


16. Keep a shoddy filing system so that citizens who file Freedom of Information applications will have to spend thousands of dollars to get the simplest of information


17. Block all emails from Bloggers, naysayers and whiners so that Councillors can enjoy their pre-Council dinners without getting indigestion before they are cut-off


18. Relocate the air races to the waterfront west of Huron Church Road. Create a special food to sell to the throngs that would come there to watch the races. Call it the Red Bull-ogna Sandwich.


19. Allow the homes on Indian Road to be demolished so that at least one law suit won't be started against the City


20. Replace the YQG sign at Windsor airport with DTW for people travelling internationally. They will think they are travelling out of a satellite terminal of Detroit's Airport since Your Quick Getaway isn't but it is Detroit's The Way that is


21. Don't spend a lot of money for books for the Library. Just tell people that the waiting list is long but they can get the book at Chapters at the mall. Then work out a deal to get commissions on each book sold too


22. Eliminate bus routes. Just say the hybrid buses are waiting for a sunny day to be recharged.


23. Your turn to add a few more...